SLEEP..

Hmm…I woke up this morning and the same embarrassing question was my “good morning” to me….do I put on my clothes and go to my univ.? let’s see what do we have 2day or should I say what is left for the day… because it was 9:30, my attempts to find my college’s schedule reached a blocked door…but GOD…a sunny morning is waiting for me…gotta catch up with it…and I said what da heck?! I’ll go to the library try to knock down some of my studying mountains, and that’s what I did…took my cd-player…and nothing but Poets of The Fall’s “Signs of Life” album, headed to the library…bought my coffee, a smile was upon my face… “ I’m gonna have fun 2day” this is what I heard myself telling me…let yesterday go to hell…actually it already went there, but you can’t go that far with such an optimistic-positive attitude, little bothering things always find some way to spoil the freewill of mine… “Through your coffee away…this is a library not a cafeteria”, was the first pain in the ass, but that couldn’t fickle my already in mind vision of my day, so I started to study, when some of my best friends came in…didn’t say hi…heh!!! What da hell is wrong with him? Let go gurl… “sa7tek bel denieh” I told myself…I got on with my studying again…to find out that I can’t get anything anymore! Why? I still don’t have an answer…but it wasn’t the coffee…it wasn’t my friend’s neglecting either.
I gathered my pieces and left the library and surprise!! It was raining!! Oh just another sign that I HAVE to blow one last breeze at my day’s blazes before they die, so I took it my way…put my earphones…turned on the machine while walking under the rain…smelling the ground’s special rainy smell, watching how beautiful Lattakia sometimes can be…I can’t write down the questions I carried home after this journey, I forgot half of them. Going with my sister to her “physical therapy” couldn’t make my day much better…going to my guitar lesson was a break… then finally going to one of my school friend’s birthday was really all that I need! GoSh!!! Sitting to people I only meet once a year, and others I don’t even know… “What Are You Doing Here For Heaven’s Sake??!!”…maybe everybody else had fun…but I couldn’t put on a smiley face as usual, though I did when taking photos, the sign this time was “ Screw this day”, so I declared “ Just Another Bad Day Is Over”…I’m writing this while listening to “Sleep”…thinking about my Adam…dear if you’re reading this “ if not, why?!”…
I just want you to know that I spent the last night singing this “Sleep” song to you…hoping you hear me …feel me, though it’s miles between, but it’s only a map thingy as we always believed, and I wanna dedicate it once again to you, I’ll be waiting when this -bad phase- is gone, I just hope it won’t last for too long…because I miss you…and:
Hear your heartbeat Beat a frantic pace
And it's not even seven AM
You're feeling the rush of anguish settling
You cannot help showing them in.
So hurry up then
Or you'll fall behind
and They will take control of you
And you need to heal
The hurt behind your eyes
Fickle words crowding your mind
So…Sleep, sugar, let your dreams flood in,
Like waves of sweet fire, you're safe within.
Sleep, sweetie, let your floods come rushing in,
And carry you over to a new morning
Try as you might You try to give it up
Seems to be holding on fast
It's hand in your hand A shadow over your
A beggar for soul in your face
Still it don't matter
If you won't listen
If you won't let them follow you
You just need to heal
Make good all your lies
Move on and don't look behind
Day after day
Fickle visions
Messing with your head
Fickle vicious
Sleeping in your bed
Messing with your head
Fickle visions Fickle vicious…